Gaaawwwddddd

I will laugh because otherwise I might just put my head in my hands and cry,and I wonder why I feel up and down so much, day two of my week and patient two had to go and expire last night. First thing this morning, police on the phone, angry family members, you get the point. So here I find myself dealing with the death stuff again, over and over, I think I reach a point where I understand, have some comfort and then two families to deal with in two days, so much emotional stuff. They are thankful and grateful for everything that was done but are upset and angry and sad they could do nothing. When I first started working here, my one Dr asked if I had seen the move The Sixth Sense, I replied yes (it was a good movie) he said "Well all my patients are dead they just do not know it yet." Now to the outside observer that might seem a bit harsh but this is the man that has accepted the burden to tell these people honestly that they can not be fixed. He has to make light of it somehow otherwise he would be a very sad and angry man. I suppose that is one of the reasons I do enjoy working here because at the end of the day the people I work with are compassionate, caring, honest people that do not work in private practice, would rather take care of patients and do research. They not only work here but over at the VA as well and that really is not for the money. I feel a bit better remembering my reasons for wanting to be here, to give back to the family and patients something that was given to me, to allow me to see the hope, strength and courage our patients and family face, and to be able to meet some truly amazing people (even if short periods of time). I guess it is not too bad but dealing with police on the phone before coffee, they should know better!!! Ahhh well, back to work, it is going to be a busy day!

Ohh, and my bean is trying out for the girls soccer team today!! Go, my bean!!